Wishin' and hopin'?

I probably spent a good three days convincing myself that I didn't need to take a pregnancy test.  I had some pretty good arguments, too.  Such as, I had been traveling to Denver, so the flying and time change (yes, I realize that it's only one hour) affected me.   Or, that I had a delayed ovulation or possibly didn't even ovulate at all.  Yes, that was it, after the stressful summer and the new acquisition, it made perfect sense.  But, I would stare at my chart with its obvious thermal shift and count fourteen days and realize that day 14 was actually three days ago.  After I had dinner with my sister and couldn't bring myself to order a margarita I had to admit that maybe, just maybe, the chart wasn't wrong.

So, after picking up a test on my way home I was still doing a great job at convincing myself it was negative.  We had been discussing the idea of a baby, but were still at the "when" stage.  When would we want to start trying?  When would be a good time for us? When will our finances be in a place to support a baby? When would we be out of an apartment and into a house?  But, God had reminded me that He was in control and whenever we had kids would be when He planned.  I felt at peace after this, and was thankful that I have a Father who is in control.  A week later though, I was staring at the positive test and telling Him that I changed my mind.  

I sat on the bathroom floor for several minutes unable to move from shock at seeing a positive pregnancy test.  When Ryan came home and I showed him, I was still shaking and in shock.  The next day I went to my family doctor's office to confirm the test, and was still couldn't believe it when the doctor came into the room telling me congratulations and giving me a hug. This was just added onto when she asked me if I was taking prenatal vitamins.  Prenatal vitamins?  I had only been pregnant for twelve hours and already I was behind?  So now I was in shock, with a good dose of guilt thrown in.

But, I soon scheduled an appointment with an OB, which helped ease the guilt.  And then I got onto the Internet.  When in doubt or unsure, always go first to God and pray, and then go to Google to educate yourself.  I started figuring out due dates and such, and realized that our baby would be due mid-to late July.  My guess was July 19th (I ended up being off only by one day.)  Wow, July 2011.  And I started smiling.